AHH

>> Jamie may be leaving again. Gosh. As it was last year, it is again one of the hardest situations to go through. I feel like I am his ONLY good stable influence. He is a good kid. He is a fun kid. I have SO much fun being with him. They will not let him have a razor at the receiving home, so I kept him after school today and brought him one to use. Then brought him back around 4. I seriously want to bring him home everyday. Let him sit in my house, eat a snack, do some homework, read. All these things a stable household should be. He has NEVER had that. Well, he has lived with two different uncles and they were good. But, they could not handle him so, it did not work out. So what not? He gets moved to another NEW enviornment. ANOTHER new family. ANOTHER new school. How is that fair? When is it too much? When am I caring too much? There too much? I don't think there is a too much, but maybe there is? This is so beyond anything I have been trained to deal with. Caring for these kids, loving this kids. It's hard.

>> so what now? We wait. We wait to see what his social worker does. He has no say in anything because he is under 16. He cannot even talk during his court dates. He needs to be taught to advocate for himself. But, he can't. It's hard. So, he ends up getting moved again and I may never hear or talk to him again? That's what happened after last year, and I thought I'd never see him again, but now he's back so how do we prevent that? How to I ensure he knows I am here for him no matter what, because that's what he needs. This seems so impossible.