exhaustion

>>Exhaustion is setting in. I am taking on too much. Everyone says that your first year of teaching is when you can barely survive, and you are over whelmed, figuring out life, etc, etc. Right now, I am taking on too much.
I have 9 students.
I also have 1 RSP student for math, and 3 of the other SDC teachers students for math different periods (which means I have to grade them even though their teachers are suppling work),
I work 3 days a week after school for 2 hours with my home -hospital student,
I am on the Positive Behavior Supports committee, and through that my job as working with wrap around requires me to attend meetings with students are need help outside of school between family, life, friends, etc.,
I am on another committee called sunshine that helps provide staff members with treats during birthdays, marriages, staff meetings, etc.
we have department meetings at least twice a month with out Special education department.
I have 5 triennial IEP's and 1 initial which means that student needs to be completely reassessed and reports need to be written.
And finally I have to complete BTSA (two versions) which is required for all new teachers in order to clear your credential. This requires MORE meetings, volunteer hours, article reading, etc, etc, etc.

>>THIS IS TOO MUCH. Lot's of this stuff is required so I can't get out of it. I am falling behind on essential things. Losing items. Forgetting papers. THIS IS NOT ME. Then I get home by 5:15 - 5:30 eat dinner and then I want to sleep. I need to breath, and handle it, but it's daunting. I need to make lists, check things off, one by one, but right now the amount is over whelming. Then, I forget to do something and it puts me right back down where I started. So, I will go and finish grades (because progress reports are due friday). I will attempt to begin testing a student tomorrow. I will send home assessment plans, and finish Monday IEP's. I will take my students to the assembly tomorrow, deal with a substitute for one of my I.A.'s attempt to allow other people to help me accomplish what I know will get done.

>>In other news, I almost cried today at school, for some stupid reason. Phillip was drinking his gatorade outside the classroom (I worry about messes and spills). When I went to check outside, he was just gone. I searched THE ENTIRE SCHOOL. Ran around the hallways, had students check the bathrooms, checked the office, spare rooms, bushes. Then, he was just there. I was so so so so frustrated. I could not express to him how much he scared me and he did not even understand. I was so frustrated (I know, i said that already) and he just acted like it was nothing. I know he did not understand.

>> Breathe.. Breathe.. Make list.. check things off... get through it. .. adapt.. breathe..